Communication…Making or Breaking Relationships for Years

Every day we use communication to function in our daily life.  Without communication we would not be able to do our jobs, share joy with others, convey needs, or truly function effectively.  One area of our life where communication should be a cornerstone above all others is in our relationships however.  This also seems to be the area where communication is alarmingly lost!  In this post we are going to explore communication and how it can lead to a healthy relationship or act as a wrecking ball and destroy it.

Relationships are hard.  They take effort and constant nurturing.  It has to be a joint effort at all times and when one slacks in areas the other has to be willing to pick up and take up that slack.  The same should be returned by the other party when the time comes.  It has become all too easy for people to give up on relationships and with today’s legal system a divorce is by far easier to obtain than it once was.  With it becoming more socially acceptable to have a divorce people are even more readily seeking divorce when before they may have put more effort into salvaging a relationship.  

So what role does communication play in a relationship?  Communication should be the cornerstone of any relationship.  In fact communication is listed as the number three reason for divorce.  When a couple starts to develop ineffective communication it is inevitable that every aspect of the relationship will be impacted. 

What is ineffective communication?  Ineffective communication can be as simple as not having enough throughout the day.  Conversations may become one sided.  If you find yourself wanting to share your day with your significant other but then you do not appear to be interested in hearing about theirs.  This could start to build resentment with your significant other.  You may soon find they may be less interested in your day.  They may even start to make snide comments or become embittered with you trying to talk about your day.  If you want to share about your days and all of the trials and tribulations you faced, then you should be willing to hear theirs as well.  

Be mindful of your nonverbal communication.  This can be more telling than words or tone.  If you give the impression that your are getting annoyed with listening to your significant other’s muses.  This may make them more hesitant to share.  If your partner does not feel open to sharing with you.  If they feel you don’t care.  If they feel they are being treated as less than you.  These cues will lead to a break down in communication.  This will lead to lack of intimacy.  Resentment will most likely set in.  Then total communication may be lost.  This could lead to the demise of the relationship.  

Relationships take effort, patience, commitment, and desire to make things work.  We can make them as hard, or as easy as we chose to make them.  Just remember that communication should be healthy.  Be mindful of your tone, nonverbal reactions, body posture, and be attentive as your listening.  If you keep yourself open, share often, be supportive, and stay intimate with your partner you will be amazed at how rewarding your relationship can be.  

If you find that communication is lacking in your relationship, if you feel your are becoming distant from your significant other, not all is lost.  If you are both willing to work on opening up communication again.  If you are willing to take the time to analyze your role in the breakdown of communication.  If you then are willing to admit that your wrong and implement a change of action in behaviors.  Then your relationship can start to heal and mend.

This will be a series of articles, so stay tuned, there is more to come!  Thanks for reading.  

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